Questions Answered: Prologue
It was night time and Elizabeth could feel the bones in her body pleading for some mercy as she walked towards the docks. After pulling a double shift at Kelly’s, all she wanted was the solace of being alone in her studio.
But before that she needed a moment to breathe. Just a second to let the nothingness wash over her. Her mind and her body had been worn out by the past few days. She had been fighting so hard. Against what? She wasn’t really sure. Her heart. Her mind. Herself. Him. The truth. It all just seemed to build.
Her world seemed to have turned frigid and cold ever since that night. She had stared at him and finally saw him as the stranger she had tried to make herself believe him to be. She had fought so long and hard to make him another one of many people who had passed through her life. Someone who didn’t belong in her life anymore. She struggled with the what if’s and if only’s, but never succeeded. It was like trying to change a dream when it was the reality that you wanted to be different.
But the reality did change. It changed that night at General Hospital when she looked at him over Ric’s body and saw an emptiness there she had never seen before. It wasn’t even the signature coldness of Jason Morgan, it was just . . . nothing. A man had been shot and when she looked in Jason’s eyes, there was no spark, not even an attempt at being unfeeling. There is a difference, you know, between being unfeeling and not feeling something. In the one instance, you know what’s going on but choose not to care. In the other, you don’t even realize that you should feel anything at all.
So many times she had tried to tell herself that the man she knew was an uncaring, cold-blooded killer who she could never be with. These were the lies she used to convince herself that it was right for her to walk away and it justified why he never tried to stop her. She kept repeating these thoughts, but it never worked. Not until that night.
Even though she had fought for that image of him, it still surprised her when it became real. Mostly because she wasn’t the one who had succeeded in imagining it. No, he was the one who made it a reality. The disbelief in his eyes when she tried to scream the truth into him did nothing. Instead, he just sent her away. In that moment, he had killed the last hope she had that he was the man she had believed in the few months before. Man, it felt like a lifetime ago.
Now all she was left with was her thoughts. He had turned her away and shown her that he wasn’t what she had thought he would be. She thought it was because of his life he couldn’t be open with her and she had thought his life couldn’t be a place she could live in. She was wrong, because he could. He could change his life, bend his rules, be someone she could be with.
Elizabeth laughed inwardly. Jason could be the man she could be with when he was with Courtney. What a joke.
Elizabeth stared out at the water, pausing to admire the view. If only she could do that. If only she could look at the water and not think of sitting on the bench with a cup of coffee next to a man who she only wanted to forget. Even the sight of the moon reflecting on the water was tainted. She had stood here with him once, admiring that same moon. Just one more memory that wouldn’t fade.
She had taken the steps after that night. She had made the motions to move on with her life, but something always drew her back. She thought that once she saw him for what he really was, her feelings for him would just die on their own. She was dead wrong.
She fought, she really had, but some things you can’t escape. The things that haunt her most are the questions. The nagging, pestering questions that never seemed to quiet even when she offered up an answer. It’s because she knew the answers were lies. She was a fool to try and lie to herself. She had already tried to fight and she should have learned her lesson. You can’t fight yourself. You can only accept what your heart tells you and go with it.
As Elizabeth took one last deep breath, she felt a warm wind against her skin. It was strange, misplaced somehow. It was still winter in Port Charles and though it didn’t snow, the air was cold.
She shook her head, trying to shake off the feeling that was causing goosebumps on her arm. It was just being on the pier, she told herself. The memories are starting to play tricks on you, she thought.
Elizabeth wrapped the coat tighter around herself and turned towards the steps. Suddenly, she felt an arm wrap around her waist and a cloth cover her mouth. Before she had the chance to scream her body went limp and a blackness filled her. Her last thought was of that paling moon over the water. If she was going to die, at least she had that image to remember as her last vision on this earth.
Elizabeth’s body was carried up the steps towards her studio as her captor walked quickly through the shadows. The dark figure knew where to go and he had to move fast. Time wasn’t on his side, but he would do his job. This was the point of no return and he would make sure that Elizabeth Webber wouldn’t have a chance to stand on the docks alone again.
Meanwhile, another figure stepped towards the pier where Elizabeth had been standing just moments before. His face was cloaked by the darkness, but he knew his way. He stared out at the water for a moment to think. This place always calmed him. No matter where he was, this image of the moon over the water was always in the back of his mind.
As his eyes gazed around him, a flash of color caught his attention. As he looked towards the object near his feet, he leaned over to pick it up.
It was a scarf, probably dropped by someone who wasn’t paying attention. But there was something about it that was very familiar.
He looked at it closer and the scent of lilies and vanilla filled the air surrounding him. He knew this smell. He would know it anywhere.
"Elizabeth," he said to himself. He shook his head. He smelled it again to be sure that it wasn’t just his mind playing tricks on him.
The smell was the same. He looked at it in his hand. Should he return it to her? He shook his head again. No, it would mean talking to her and that never worked out right. It never seemed to work anymore.
He looked up at the studio above the pier. Maybe if he just dropped it off outside her door, he thought. He turned towards the steps and walked briskly knowing that it was just an excuse.
He couldn’t avoid her anymore. He had to know the truth. For three days, her voice had haunted him.
It bit at his heart every time he remembered it. When had she changed? When had she become someone who didn’t believe in him?
He had been trying to convince himself that she had moved on. He kept telling himself that she didn’t think they had a chance anymore. He thought of all the ways she had pushed him away, but they all failed at making him believe she had changed. He knew her. He knew her heart and he knew who she was. He had seen her lie to herself, he had seen her fight, he had seen her lash out when she was hurt. She was doing all three and he knew it. Because he knew it, he couldn’t believe that she had given up on him, on them, so quickly.
He had almost reached it a few weeks ago. He had almost convinced himself that she meant it when she said it was over. But then he had gone to see her to thank her for helping Courtney and the tears in her eyes pulled him back in. So he fought. He fought by saying things he knew would hurt her because he knew no other way. But even as he walked out the door, his heart held onto the hope that she still cared about him and that she didn’t hate him for keeping the truth from her those months ago.
Now he didn’t even have that. He felt that last hope die with those five words. "It should have been you," he whispered to himself.
After that night at General Hospital, it all changed. It had become real. Her lies were no longer lies because the pain in her eyes was real. Her words were real and he didn’t have to convince himself any longer. She couldn’t accept him and he couldn’t be with her.
As he stood outside her studio door, he remembered the pain of her rejecting him for Zander. He had saved Zander for her but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough to convince her that he wasn’t what everyone thought he was. He wasn’t just Sonny’s enforcer.
But something kept him with her. He thought that once he realized she had really walked away, he would be able to walk away too. But he couldn’t. Not when his mind wouldn’t let him.
He knocked on her door, his mind was still racing with thoughts.
There was an incompleteness to it all. Like they weren’t supposed to end that way. With Robin, there had been a reason. With Carly, there had been a reason. Hell, even with Sonny, there had been a reason to walk away. But with Elizabeth, he couldn’t think of one. With Elizabeth, he was the one who had hurt them and she had been the one to end it. He was the one who had lied to her and ignored her. With Elizabeth . . . it was his fault. Even though he knew better, he couldn’t let it end like that. He needed one last thing from her. He needed to know why.
"Elizabeth?" he called as he knocked on the door. Still no answer. It was late, where could she be?
He knocked again. "Elizabeth? It’s Jason. I found your scarf," he explained.
But still, there was nothing. Maybe she was out with her friends, he thought. But then something told him she wasn’t. Something told him she was in trouble. As he reached for his lock pick, he heard footsteps down the corridor. He looked up and saw a shadow approaching. He walked towards the hallway thinking it was Elizabeth, but then a sudden sharp pain shot through his skull.
He turned around to attack, but someone grabbed him from behind and a familiar smell filled his nostrils. Chloroform.
As his eyes started to fall shut, he tried to make out the face of his assailant. He blacked out before he could make sense of it.
"Did you get him?" a female voice said from the hallway.
The figure who had attacked Jason nodded. "He’s out. Luckily he was distracted. I wouldn’t have wanted to try this if he was on full alert. Are you sure about this?"
"I told you not to worry. I know him. He wasn’t exactly thinking he was going to be attacked," the woman said.
"I’m glad you were right. So now what?" the accomplice asked.
"What else? He’s going to join Elizabeth," she smiled.
"Is this going to work?" the man questioned.
"You ask too many questions," she laughed.
"I thought that was the point?" he said vaguely.
She shook her head. "No, that’s their job, not yours. Now hurry up," she instructed.
As the two figures pulled Jason’s body, they moved quietly and efficiently. They were on a mission and if it was the last thing they do, they’d end this by tomorrow night no matter what the costs. Jason and Elizabeth’s lives would depend on the next few hours and if they were lucky, they just might make it out alive.
Questions Answered: Chapter 1
Jason felt himself being pulled out of the darkness by a bright light and as it slowly seeped into his body, an ache filled his head. He couldn’t remember much about what happened, just that he was attacked.
His mind became suddenly alert. Despite the pain in the back of his skull, he was able to pull into automatic defense mode. His eyes opened slowly and he peered around. He was shocked by what he saw.
Meanwhile, Elizabeth was feeling that ache herself. Not because she was knocked over the head, but because she had been unconscious in a chair and her neck had cramped up. As she lifted her neck slowly, she realized she had been kidnapped. Her consciousness quickly caught up with her fear and she became aware that she was strapped to a chair. She opened her eyes and was stunned by where she was.
"Why did they take me here?" she asked herself.
"I was thinking the same thing," Jason interrupted. "Are you okay?"
Elizabeth stared at him, frozen in shock. "What are you doing here?"
"They kidnapped me too," he answered.
"But why here?" Elizabeth asked again. "Why knock me unconscious and then drag me here? And why you too? More importantly, how did they get through that door you installed?"
"That’s what I’d like to know," Jason said, gazing around the room.
It had been awhile since he had been in here. The memories they had made there started to bombard the both of them. A Valentine’s Day a lifetime ago. A Christmas even longer before that. All things that they used to have but didn’t anymore.
"I guess they’re pretty smart," Elizabeth said.
"What do you mean?" Jason asked.
"If we scream, no one will hear us through that door," Elizabeth explained.
"They can through that window," Jason said.
"But it faces the alley. No one is there during the day," Elizabeth informed him.
Jason nodded in understanding. He tugged at the knots around his wrists, but he knew it was futile. Whoever had kidnapped them were professionals. He couldn’t get through the special knot.
"What do you think they want?" Elizabeth asked, as she struggled to get out of her own confines.
He shook his head. "I don’t know. I didn’t see who attacked me," Jason said. "Don’t bother with the knots. They’re not going to budge."
Elizabeth bit her bottom lip. "Oh."
There was a long silence after that. Both tried not to speak or look at each other. One question was on both their minds. Why them? Why kidnap them both? Jason knew his enemies had reasons to get him, especially after Sonny fired him, but why Elizabeth? Elizabeth hadn’t been in his life for months and Faith knew he was with Courtney. Was there another enemy he didn’t know about?
Elizabeth stared at the canvases on the floor but even they reminded her that Jason was in the room. For the first time, he wasn’t there of his own free will and she doubted he would have ever returned here if he hadn’t been kidnapped. For some reason, that depressed her. Why was he here? She didn’t know anyone who would want to kidnap her unless Helena Cassadine was up to her old tricks again. It could be one of Jason’s enemies, but didn’t they get the memo? She wasn’t a part of his life anymore. That thought depressed her even more.
They were in danger and all she could think about was that she wished she was someone his enemies would want to kidnap. She laughed.
"What is it?" Jason asked, startled by her strange behavior.
Elizabeth looked at him. "Nothing," she lied, her laughter dying.
"Okay," Jason relented.
He would never be able to get used to her acting coldly with him, but he had to face that this was how it was going to be. He was no longer someone she trusted. Elizabeth did a lot of pretending and for the first time, Jason was the one on the other side of it.
Elizabeth sighed. He no longer asked her not to lie to him. Did he even know when she was lying anymore? More and more she wondered why it surprised her. He had become a stranger and this was just another sign reminding her that what they had was no longer there.
Jason looked around the room, hoping to find something to set them free. However, on the inside, a piece of him was glad they were trapped. Being with Elizabeth was making him face her and he needed that. Maybe now he would have a chance to do what he’d been so afraid of doing before. Ask her for the truth.
"Are we just going to wait for them to tell us why we’re here or is there some way to get out of this?" Elizabeth asked him, her tone even and calm.
"If they were going to kill us, we’d already be dead," Jason explained.
Elizabeth nodded. "I know. At least this place is better than a crypt," she joked.
Jason flinched at her answer. She did know. She had been kidnapped before . . . because of him.
Elizabeth regretted her words after she saw the look that passed through Jason’s face. She didn’t say it to hurt him. "Do we have a plan?" she asked, quickly changing the subject.
Jason shook his head. "We can’t do anything until we have more information. We don’t even know who took us or why, so until we do, we can’t take any risks."
Looking over at the makeshift mirror next to her doorway, Elizabeth smiled at a memory. A bitter smile though it was, it made her happy to remember it.
"What are you thinking about?" Jason asked, seeing the look on her face.
"You," she said.
He froze. He wasn’t expecting that answer.
"I was thinking about you telling me not to take any risks and me telling you not to worry," Elizabeth said. "I guess you were right. I got kidnapped not an hour after that."
"That was my fault," he said quickly.
Elizabeth shook her head. "No, it wasn’t. You didn’t tell them to kidnap me."
"But they knew they could use you to get to me," Jason said.
"Please don’t," Elizabeth replied.
Jason looked at her questioningly. "Don’t what?"
"Don’t remind me that I used to matter to you," she said through gritted teeth.
Her words pierced through him. "I’m sorry," Jason said.
She shook her head. "You don’t have to say that. I’m just being weird. It’s just this whole situation. Forget I said anything."
It hurt him. It hurt him to know that she didn’t think she had a right to her feelings. She had a right to be angry with him. It wasn’t wrong for her to be bitter about it. She wasn’t the one who messed up. "I can’t," he said. "I can’t forget."
"No, Jason. I need to," she said. "I need to forget. So please, just ignore me when I start to regress."
Jason wanted to respect her wishes, but something inside of him begged to know why she was still angry. If she was angry that meant that they still mattered to her. "It’s not wrong for you to be angry," Jason said.
"You seem to think so," Elizabeth retorted.
"No, I don’t," Jason refuted, surprised that she thought otherwise.
"Don’t you remember that night at Kelly’s? You told me I was the one who walked out. You told me I was the one who said there was no chance for us. Then you told me I was right," Elizabeth reminded him.
Jason flinched again. "I didn’t say it because I thought you weren’t allowed to be mad."
"Yes, you did," she replied. "When I yelled at you for walking away, you said it because you thought I was wrong to want you to stay. To want you to fight for us instead of just leaving and giving up."
"You gave up, Elizabeth. Not me," Jason said, his own anger starting to rise.
"I only left because you had already left me over and over every single night you left me alone in that penthouse to run to Courtney or Sonny or even Carly who was pretending to comfort me because I was so worried about you. Don’t you know how that makes me feel?" Elizabeth yelled. "Why am I even telling you this? You know what you did. You just don’t care."
"I had a job to do. I told you there were things I couldn’t tell you," Jason reminded her.
"What part of your job had to do with running to Courtney? When did Sonny order you to be with his sister?" Elizabeth asked.
"He told me to guard her and that’s what I did. That’s all," Jason shouted. "I can’t help it if you think anything else happened. I was never unfaithful to you."
"Unfaithful?" Elizabeth laughed bitterly. "We never had anything, remember? You don’t have to be faithful to someone you weren’t in a relationship with!"
"What are you talking about?" Jason asked.
"I made it all up in my head," Elizabeth said, remembering Courtney’s words. "We were never together. I just pushed you away one too many times and . . ."
Jason could see the tears build up in her eyes and his anger started to slip away. He didn’t know why she was saying what she was saying, but he didn’t really care. All he knew was that she was hurting and he couldn’t do anything about it. The only thing he feared more than her being in danger was the pain that he caused her. It never stopped. His life never stopped for him. Not for her safety and definitely not for what they could have had. If only he had been able to end it without hurting her so much. But Jason had learned a long time ago that everything comes with a price, especially when you try to do the right thing.
"It was my fault we never had a chance because I didn’t know what I had," Elizabeth confessed.
"You couldn’t accept my life, Elizabeth. That doesn’t make it your fault," Jason tried to comfort her.
"That’s not why I left and you know it," Elizabeth said through her tears.
Jason shook his head. "If that wasn’t the reason, then why?"
Elizabeth didn’t speak for several moments. The emotions became overwhelming but she wouldn’t let them get the best of her. "I wanted more for you, more for us. I guess you didn’t."
"I don’t understand," Jason answered.
"No, but I do. Courtney explained it to me. We almost had something, something real, but it never would have worked. Our life, the chances we had, that was all in my head because you never wanted it," Elizabeth said.
"I never told her that," Jason refuted.
"Did you tell her you loved me?" Elizabeth asked.
Stunned by the question, Jason stared at her. Dead silence. The plea in her eyes was evident. If there was ever a time he wished he could lie, it was now. "I don’t understand what that has to do with why you left."
Elizabeth didn’t answer. This was pointless. All she’d end up with was an even more shattered heart, and this wasn’t the time. Here they were, tied to two chairs in her art studio and all she could think about was what could have been. "Never mind," she told him. "Forget I asked."
Jason didn’t know what to say to that. He wanted to know why she had asked. He wanted to know why she had left if not because of his life.
Elizabeth sighed and leaned back in her seat. All she could do now was wait to find out who had captured them and see what her fate would be.
Jason looked at her from across the room, wondering what she was thinking. He wished he could be the man she had trusted. He wished he could be someone who didn’t make her cry.
Just then, the lock in the door started to rattle.
"Someone’s coming," Elizabeth said, startled.
"Just stay calm," Jason said. "Don’t let them see that you’re afraid."
Elizabeth nodded, but she knew this already. She had dealt with enough bad guys in her life to know what set them off.
As the door opened slowly, both of them felt their hearts pounding faster. Even though Jason had been in situations like this before, he had at least known his enemy. And unlike the times before, he wasn’t the only one at risk.
A figure stepped into the room and both Jason and Elizabeth felt their jaws drop.
"You both were doing so well, what happened?" the female voice questioned.
They both stared and only had one thing to say, "Why?!"
Questions Answered: Chapter 2
"Emily?!" Jason shouted in shock.
"Don’t you Emily me! I go away for a little while and everything goes to hell," she said, partly joking.
"What are you doing here?" Elizabeth asked her once best friend.
"What does it look like I’m doing? I’m here to stop you guys from ruining your lives," Emily replied matter-of-factly.
Jason stared wide-eyed at his sister. "What are you doing in Port Charles? And how did you---"
"How did I pull it off?" Emily cut off her brother.
"She had a little help," a male voice offered. Zander waved shyly at the both of them as they gave him the death stare.
"How long have you been planning this?" Elizabeth asked, surprised to see that Zander had a hand in the trap.
"Awhile," Emily provided vaguely.
"Why?" Jason asked.
"Why did we kidnap you and tie you up in this studio?" Emily said, smiling mischievously at her two prisoners.
Both nodded, awaiting a reason for their predicament.
"Well, after I called Zander and told him that I was coming back to Port Charles, I asked him how things were going. He filled me in on all the general stuff but when I heard that Jason was back in town . . . well, let’s just say that’s when the interrogation began. He told me about Elizabeth’s kidnapping and the shooting and the warehouse bombing." Emily paused and laughed. "I miss out on all the fun stuff, don’t I?"
"That still doesn’t explain why we’re here," Jason interrupted, shaking his head at his sister’s attitude.
"Well after all that business, Zander told me about Sonny’s fake death," Emily informed them. "You know, when everything went haywire. You two must be the most stubborn people I know. I don’t know what you’d do without me."
"We wouldn’t be tied to these chairs against our will," Jason supplied.
"Ha ha," Emily said sarcastically. "If you two weren’t just screaming for some outside assistance, we wouldn’t have to go to these extremes. Anyway, I recruited Zander into helping me kidnap the both of you and take you here. He took care of the kidnapping and I took care of the rest."
Elizabeth and Jason glared at their captors. Zander held up his hands in surrender. "It was her idea," he said quickly.
Emily elbowed her partner. "You were all for it," she reminded Zander. "Not that I have to tell you, Jason. Jason can spot a liar a mile away, can’t you Jase?"
Jason nodded slowly, still confused and upset by the situation his sister had forced him in.
Emily continued. "Which brings me to the issue at hand. You’ve both been doing a whole lot of lying lately. To yourselves and to each other. Why? I remember when you two had a hard time being honest to anyone BUT each other."
Neither answered. It wasn’t because they didn’t agree. They both recognized the truth in what Emily had to say. They just had nothing to offer that would justify their lies or convince someone like Emily that they weren’t just hiding behind their pride. Emily knew them too well.
"So what does kidnapping us have to do with that?" Jason asked, trying to change the subject and get to the bottom of Emily’s strange behavior.
"Well since you won’t talk to each other because you’re both so damn proud, we thought we’d give you a little push," Emily explained.
"A little push?" Elizabeth repeated sarcastically.
"We?" Zander asked.
"Yes, we," Emily glared at him. "Okay, well, maybe it was a bit over the top, but you guys asked for it. You have danced around each other for months and I’m putting a stop to that right now. You two either talk it out or you’re both going to be stuck here for a very, VERY long time."
"You can’t make us stay," Elizabeth protested.
"Oh yeah? Just ask Jason how secure those ropes are. After all, he was the one who taught me how to do it," Emily smiled.
"Great job, Jason," Elizabeth smirked.
"It’s not my fault," Jason said defensively. "I didn’t think she’d use it against me."
"Now, now, none of that. The sooner you accept the situation, the sooner you’ll get out of here," Emily said.
"What do you want with us?" Elizabeth asked, still confused about Emily’s motivation.
"What good is tying us up in a room together?" Jason added.
"Geez, enough questions for us. You two should be directing questions at each other," Emily replied.
They both looked at Emily with complete confusion.
"I give up," Elizabeth sighed, exasperated.
"I don’t get it," Jason said, squirming against the knots around his wrists.
"Do I really have to spell it out for you?" Emily asked. After neither replied, Emily threw up her hands and looked at Zander. "You see? This is why I had to butt in."
Zander nodded, avoiding the look in Jason’s eyes.
Emily turned to face Jason and Elizabeth. "You’re both here to talk things out. Ask each other what you’ve both been dying to ask but have been too afraid or too proud to do before. In this room, you two built something real, something amazing. You would still have it if you weren’t so afraid."
Both Jason and Elizabeth looked down at the floor. The truth of Emily’s words hit them hard.
"In this room, you have no way to escape. There will be no walking away. No chances for misunderstandings. No other people to hide behind or excuses to pretend you’re okay," Emily said emphatically. "There has been too much of that already."
Jason and Elizabeth glanced at each other briefly, recognizing that Emily saw through their actions.
Emily continued. "Now you can take this opportunity to fix things or decide right here and now that it’s over. That’s your choice. I can’t make you two feel something you don’t feel. I am just removing any obstacles that have kept you from what you both have been searching for all along. The truth," Emily explained. "Whatever it is you two are meant to be, that will be decided tonight."
"Zander, I can’t believe you went along with this," Elizabeth said, hoping to get Zander to go on her side, desperately afraid of what would happen if she stayed.
"Hey, missy, I know about what you did with my ex," Emily intervened. "Now, I won’t hold it against you, but don’t think he’s your way out of this."
Elizabeth’s jaw dropped. It was a mistake. What she had done was wrong when she knew Emily still had feelings for Zander.
"Your only way out is to talk to each other. Ask the questions you have tried to bury inside," Emily encouraged. She reached out and held Elizabeth’s hand. She knelt down and looked Elizabeth in the eye. Very calmly she said, "I forgive you. I know what happened and why it did. Now you need to forgive yourself."
"Forgive myself?" Elizabeth asked.
Jason listened carefully. What did Emily mean?
Emily didn’t reply. Instead, she reached for her brother’s hand. "I didn’t understand this at first, Jason. I didn’t know what you two had. I tried to stop it, but now I know the truth. I hope you’ll stop denying it too."
Jason looked at his sister. She was being serious and he was helpless. He was going to be forced to face Elizabeth and he didn’t know if he was ready. It could all too easily mean the end and he didn’t want to let go yet.
Emily stood up and walked towards the door. "I’ll be back in two hours with some food. Zander will be outside if you need anything, but don’t try any funny stuff. I only did this for your own good."
With that, Emily and Zander left and closed the door behind them.
Elizabeth and Jason stared at the door that barricaded them from the outside world. Then they turned and their eyes locked. Emily wasn’t kidding. There was nowhere to hide.
Questions Answered: Chapter 3
It was almost an hour before either of them said a word. They did everything they could to distract themselves, anything but face each other. However, they knew that forever was a long time and Emily was just stubborn enough to make them wait that long before she let them go. Finally, Elizabeth spoke.
"So I guess we know how they got through the door," Elizabeth said, gesturing as best she could to the steel barricade.
"Zander," Jason answered, remembering how Zander had stayed at the studio.
Elizabeth nodded. "I knew he was mad I blew him off, but I thought he forgave me," Elizabeth joked. Then she added, "But people aren’t always what they seem."
Jason didn’t laugh, didn’t even react. He said simply, "I never trusted him."
"I did," Elizabeth said solemnly. After a pause, she commented, "Maybe that’s why you never trusted me."
"What?" Jason asked. "Of course I trusted you."
"Then why didn’t you try, Jason? Why did you break our promise?" Elizabeth shot at him. Suddenly the emotion from before gathered inside her gut and focused towards him.
"You told me that we were over. I already answered that," Jason said through gritted teeth.
"Not after, Jason," Elizabeth said. "BEFORE. Why didn’t you try before it came to that point?"
"To what point, Elizabeth? We didn’t have any problems until you walked out," Jason said, but even he knew that wasn’t the truth.
Elizabeth choked out a bitter laugh. "We didn’t have anything," she answered. "Not anything that mattered. We didn’t have trust . . . and we didn’t have love."
Jason looked away. His heart ached with each painful word that passed through her lips. "That’s not true. I always trusted you. I guess you never trusted me."
Elizabeth stared at him. "I trusted you with my life. What more can you ask for? I got shot, kidnapped, threatened . . . all because I was with you. Whether it was friendship or something more, your enemies always found me, but I never walked away."
"I know," Jason acknowledged. "But you never trusted me with your heart."
Elizabeth’s eyes began to tear. "I told you. Anyone can break a heart, Jason. I told you that I would take that risk, or did you forget? Like the way you forgot our friendship?"
"You said the words, but you walked out the moment it became real," Jason countered.
"Ditto," Elizabeth said.
"I never walked out on us," Jason whispered. "I can’t help the fact that Sonny had to fake his death to save his family. I had to go to him to see what he needed and what Carly needed because it was my job."
"I thought you didn’t lie, Jason," Elizabeth said, wishing she could wipe the tears from her eyes.
"I’m not lying," Jason refuted. "I know you were jealous of Courtney, and I know what you think of us now, but I promise you that nothing happened until after we were over."
Elizabeth shook her head. It was hard to hear him say it, but she would not let her weakness show. "Not . . . not about that," Elizabeth spoke. "You said you left because of your job, but we both know that’s not true."
Jason looked at her for a moment and then realized something. "You’re right. It’s more than a job to me, Elizabeth. Sonny and Carly, they’re my friends . . . my family. I couldn’t let them down."
Elizabeth nodded. "But that wasn’t it, was it Jason? You lied to me, kept the truth from me, however you want to phrase it . . . why? Barely anyone knew I was close to Sonny. The only people who knew were you and Carly. Why would it matter if I knew the truth? No one would look at me and say, ‘Hey she’s not grieving the way she’s supposed to.’ Or didn’t you think I could keep a secret? Didn’t you think I could play along? Maybe you think I can’t handle the responsibility."
"Elizabeth, it wasn’t about you," Jason said weakly.
"You keep saying that!" Elizabeth shouted. "Every time you say that you make what we had matter less and less. Can’t you see? It WAS about us. This was your first chance to show me that you cared. That I mattered enough to you to be told the truth."
"Elizabeth, how many times did I say there are things I can’t tell you? Things about business that you can’t know? Every time you told me you could. You argued with me and then you promised me you would try," Jason shouted back. "What about THAT?"
"This wasn’t business, and even if it was, what did BUSINESS have to do with leaving me alone at the penthouse every chance you got? Letting me worry about you because I was afraid you were going crazy with grief? You were THERE. You know how I was after I thought Lucky had died. I did stupid things that I shouldn’t have, things I wouldn’t normally do. I thought the same thing was happening to you," Elizabeth said tersely.
Jason nodded slowly, his heart feeling heavy knowing how much she cared about him.
"God, Jason. Did you even ASK Sonny if you could tell me? Or did you just assume everyone meant me too?" Elizabeth questioned.
Jason shook his head but replied, "Sonny wouldn’t have wanted you to know. He didn’t even want Carly involved until he thought about what it would do to her."
Elizabeth sniffed back a few tears, swearing to herself that she wouldn’t fall apart. "What it would do to CARLY? So I guess, Sonny and Carly get to care about each other’s feelings, but we don’t?"
Jason stared at her, watching the trail of tears falling down her face. "It wasn’t like that, Elizabeth. I didn’t think that you would hurt so much because of it. I tried to keep you out of it."
"Let’s not start that again," Elizabeth said, her tears drying against the stillness of the room. "You thought you were protecting me? God, Jason, it’s not like the whole hoax was anything foreign to me. I had to do it myself when Helena Cassadine was after me. You think I wouldn’t have understood?"
Her confession surprised him and it showed. His face was broken from its cold façade.
"You didn’t know?" Elizabeth asked. "I would have thought Sonny told you. After all, he helped me. Gave me my own suite in his casino."
Jason’s hands balled into two fists as he started to realize his mistake. He shook his head. "It wouldn’t have mattered."
"Even if you had known you wouldn’t have told me?" Elizabeth asked.
Jason didn’t respond.
"That’s okay, I know you wouldn’t have," Elizabeth said. "You didn’t tell Mike or Courtney, why should you tell me? Wait, maybe because Mike and Courtney were Sonny’s choices. I was yours."
"What?" Jason asked, turning to look at her piercing gaze.
"I understand that you couldn’t tell Sonny’s family, because you have this code. People can do what they want and you won’t tell them what to do, right or wrong," Elizabeth said. "But you could have told me. You just had to say that it was something that had to do with business and I would have understood. Instead, you had me believe that your best friend had been shot and that you were hiding your feelings."
"I can’t help what you thought," Jason said. "I never told you I was hiding my feelings."
"But don’t you get it, Jason? You didn’t HAVE to. I know you. I know that when something huge happens in your life, you don’t react. I was there after you were shot, after Carly slept with Sonny. You just froze out that part of your life until you figured out how to deal with it. I thought that was what you were doing with your grief," Elizabeth explained.
Jason stared at the floor, the guilt starting to eat away at him from the inside.
Elizabeth sighed. "You said you’d respect me, listen to me, be honest with me and that you would never hurt me on purpose. Obviously those were just words to you."
Jason tried to argue, but he knew anything he would say would only hurt her more. He did break those promises and no amount of excuses would make it right.
Elizabeth watched his reaction, feeling disappointed as he seemed to just accept what she said with defeat. Feeling the ropes start to loosen around her wrists, she paused from her struggle for release. At least she had gotten some answers. She knew now why he hadn’t told her. He didn’t think she could handle it, but most of all, he didn’t realize what she had gone through while he had kept the truth from her.
Most of it was a misunderstanding, but what wasn’t when it came to them? That was what their relationship had become. One big misunderstanding. She thought they had something real and he . . . well, he didn’t.
That still bothered her. How could she have been so mistaken about them? She had to know.
"So how about after?" she asked.
He looked up, surprised that she still wanted to talk. "After what?"
"After I left," Elizabeth said. "Why didn’t you try harder? You said it was because I ended it, but you know me better than that, Jason. You know I say things I don’t mean when I’m angry."
Jason nodded. "I knew," he admitted.
"So then why the excuses? Why didn’t you try harder?" Elizabeth repeated.
Jason looked straight at her. "Why don’t you ask what you really want to ask?"
Elizabeth’s mouth fell open. "What do you mean?"
"You want to know why I’m with Courtney. So ask me," Jason said.
The look in Elizabeth’s eyes said everything. That was what she wanted to know, but she’d always been afraid to ask. She was afraid because knowing the truth made it real. It might prove to her that it was HER fault she had lost the best thing that had ever happened to her. But now there was no escape. This was her chance to know the truth and face it.
"Okay," Elizabeth said. "I’m game if you are."
Jason flinched, remembering the last time she had said it.
"I’m not trying to hurt you."
"Well you are, just like I’ve hurt you. Now, we can keep doing this --- going back and forth, piling on the misunderstandings --- or we can start being honest about how we really feel. I’m game if you are."
He had a feeling she had said it on purpose.
Questions Answered: Chapter 4
"Hey Bobbie," Emily greeted as she stepped into Kelly’s.
"How’s my favorite waitress?!" Bobbie exclaimed, shocked to see Emily back in town and looking so healthy. She reached out to hug the brunette.
"Don’t kid, Bobbie, I’m still recovering," Emily joked, embracing the older woman.
"So what are you doing here?" Bobbie questioned. "How long have you been back?"
"Not long," Emily answered. Then she noticed a blonde girl staring at her from behind the counter and Emily turned to face her. "Excuse me, can I help you with something?"
Courtney blushed and smiled. She explained quickly, "No, it’s just, well, do you know Jason Morgan?"
Emily nodded, unsure of this girl. "Yeah, he’s my brother."
Courtney stuck out her hand. "I’m Courtney. Jason mentioned you. Emily Quartermaine, right?"
Emily raised an eyebrow but she promised herself she wouldn’t judge what Jason chose to do with his life. Even if it meant this life-size Barbie in front of her. "Nice to meet you," Emily said, accepting Courtney’s hand in a handshake.
"Is there anything I can get you?" Courtney asked sweetly.
Emily couldn’t help but be sucked in by the girl’s sincerity. "Sure. Can I get two Jason Morgan specials and a large salad?"
Courtney looked at her in confusion. "A what?"
"A salad," Emily repeated. "Large."
Courtney blushed, "No, I mean, I’m not familiar with the Jason Morgan special."
Emily looked at the girl curiously. Bobbie interrupted before Emily could respond. "Courtney’s only been working here for a few months. It’s okay, I’ll get it."
Emily nodded as Bobbie walked to the back kitchen.
Courtney watched the brunette with careful curiosity. "Did Jason tell you about me?"
Emily shook her head. Emily examined the girl behind the counter. Blonde hair, blue eyes, too soon to gage a personality, but something about the girl bugged her. She just seemed so . . . shallow. What was it about this girl that made Jason walk away from his chance with a woman he’d been falling in love with for over three years? Emily didn’t have a clue, but she’d give the girl a chance.
"I haven’t really talked to Jason lately," Emily explained.
"Oh," Courtney said, a note of disappointment in her voice.
"But I know who you are," Emily offered. Zander told me plenty, Emily thought.
Courtney stared back in surprise. "You do?"
Emily nodded, but looked at the other girl skeptically. "I’m a bit surprised though. You don’t look like Sonny at all."
"Everyone says that," Courtney grinned. "It’s the hair and the eyes and well, practically everything. I take after my mother and he takes after his."
Emily nodded, not really interested in this girl except for that irritating need to know what made Courtney so attractive to Jason. She seemed nice, polite, decent-looking but that still didn’t fit. After being in love with two people as passionate as Robin and Carly, Emily just couldn’t imagine this girl with Jason. When Jason loved someone, it took a long time for him to admit to his feelings and even longer to admit them to the woman he loved. How was it that this girl had Jason after only a few months?
Following a long pause, Courtney asked, "Have you seen Jason since you’ve been back?"
Emily bit her lower lip, distracted from her trail of thought. "Nope. I’ll probably see him around, though," she responded vaguely.
"He was supposed to come home last night and he didn’t," Courtney explained worriedly.
Emily leaned forward against the counter. "I’m sure he’s doing something for Sonny or out on his bike. If you wait in the garage, Johnny could probably tell you if Jason’s been in and out of the penthouse."
Courtney asked with surprise, "Don’t you know?"
Emily raised an eyebrow. Apparently she didn’t know. She questioned, "Know what?"
"Jason doesn’t live at the penthouse anymore. He’s staying with me at our loft," Courtney explained.
Emily had to hold onto all her control to keep her jaw from slamming to the floor. She had no idea it had gone that far. Jason was living with the girl?! She was going to kill Zander for not telling her that vital piece of information.
Emily quickly hid her shock and shrugged. "Like I said, I didn’t talk to Jason recently. I had no idea you two were that serious."
"It’s not that," Courtney admitted. "He just moved in recently. He’s been living with me ever since Sonny fired him."
"WHAT?!" Emily shouted. Her exclamation had boomed throughout the restaurant. All eyes turned to her and Emily quickly lowered her voice. She whispered back, "What do you MEAN Jason was fired?"
Courtney jumped at Emily’s outburst but quickly calmed herself. She answered indignantly, "Well, Sonny thought he could run Jason’s life but when he found out he couldn’t, he fired Jason."
"That can’t be," Emily said, thinking out loud. "Jason’s always worked for Sonny. It’s his life. How could Sonny do that to him? They are like father and son . . ."
"Sonny made Jason choose between loving me and working for the mob and Jason chose me," Courtney informed Emily.
Emily shook her head in disbelief. "And you just let him walk away from the only life he’s ever known? A life that is as much a part of him as his own heart?"
"I didn’t let him do anything. I didn’t even know Sonny would fire him," Courtney said defensively.
"Well you know about it now and Jason doesn’t have his job back if he’s living with you. Why is that?" Emily yelled at the other girl. "Sonny needs Jason to protect him and his family and Jason needs that job."
"Sonny brought it on himself," Courtney argued. "He was the one who made the ultimatum. Jason made his choice and Sonny has to live with it."
"Even if it costs him his life?" Emily said, staring at Courtney like she had three heads. "I’d hate to have you for a sister!"
Courtney glared at Emily and hissed, "Look, I tried to tell Jason that it wasn’t worth it. I tried to tell him that our love shouldn’t hurt people but he insisted that it was okay."
"So what?" Emily said through gritted teeth. Geez, was this girl really that blind?
Courtney stared wide-eyed. "Jason said it was okay and he doesn’t lie."
"Very good. Should I applaud you for how well you obviously DON’T know him? Jason is a man. He has his pride and he won’t back down," Emily told Courtney. "He may not lie but sometimes he doesn’t realize things right away. He wouldn’t have walked away from Sonny unless something pushed him."
"What are you insinuating? You barely know me and you don’t know what Jason and I share. Why are you acting like it was my fault?" Courtney shot at the other girl. "Maybe something DID push him. Love."
Emily didn’t even blink. "I don’t care how much you love him," Emily said tersely. "You obviously don’t love him enough."
"What do you know?" Courtney asked angrily. It was obvious that Emily’s interrogation irritated her. "You have no right to judge us. You haven’t even been around."
Emily shook her head. "It doesn’t matter where I’ve been. If you cared about him at all, you would see how much you’re taking from him because you are too selfish to let him go."
"Are you telling me Jason’s not allowed to be happy? You’re obviously taking Sonny’s side in all this. Sonny can have Carly and Michael but Jason can’t have anyone?" Courtney questioned vehemently.
"Did Sonny say that? Because if I know Sonny, he didn’t. He just said Jason can’t be with you," Emily snapped back.
Courtney glowered at the brunette. "What’s the difference?"
Emily tightened her lips in response. "Simple. Jason had someone once and Sonny didn’t do anything to stop it, he never wanted to. Jason loved her with everything he had. She tried to get him to leave the life and Sonny gave in because he wanted what was best for Jason. He didn’t try to keep Jason from being happy," Emily informed the girl.
"What exactly are you getting at?" Courtney asked. "I can’t help it if I’m Sonny’s sister."
Emily shook her head. The girl really didn’t get it.
"Emily, here’s your order," Bobbie said, holding out two brown bags for Emily.
Emily accepted them and turned to the blonde waitress. "Can you honestly tell me, that if Jason was with anyone else, he would have had to rip his heart in two in order to be with her?"
Courtney glared at Emily. "If Sonny commanded it, yes."
"But that’s the point, he wouldn’t," Emily said. "He’s only doing this because he doesn’t want the life to touch you when he can avoid it."
"What do you know?" Courtney yelled.
"I know that Jason didn’t want me with a man because he was dangerous and Jason was right," Emily said. "Jason’s just too convicted in his beliefs to order me to walk away. Sonny isn’t."
"So I’m just supposed to let Sonny control my life and keep Jason from true love because I’m Sonny’s sister?" Courtney asked with an incredulous tone in her voice.
"True love, you keep throwing it around like you know what it means. If you loved him, REALLY loved him, you would have let him go," Emily replied evenly.
"No one could do that," Courtney said. "No one would sacrifice true love just because of Sonny and his stupid orders."
Emily shook her head and sighed. "Oh yeah? I can think of one person."
"Who?"
Emily raised an eyebrow and gestured to Courtney’s apron. "She’s a waitress right here at Kelly’s. You might know her."
"Elizabeth?!" Courtney exclaimed.
"Oh, you do know her," Emily smiled. Then she grabbed her bags and walked out the door.